Love was on my mind all day today. Loving other was easy to do, however, when it comes to loving myself, it was a different story. Sure, there were some days where I felt confident and loved myself for who I am. There were some days where I often questioned myself and my progress so far in this life. I am often hard on myself. Perhaps it had to do with some choices I made or the difficult relationships I had. I know I made those choices based on fears. Some choices I made just because I wanted to rebel or wanted to be loved. Needless to say, those choices have consequences. It all backfired on me because I allowed other to hurt me. I knew and saw the red flags so many times but I ignored it thinking I could change the course or get out before I get hurt. Regardless what happened, it was inevitable for people to get hurt because there were feelings involved.
I am not saying love hurts but it hurts because it is a powerful energy and people thrive on it. I know I love feeling the love. It is an amazing experience being with someone who love you for who you are. That’s the true love. I never have been in love. I thought I did but now that I look back I realized I didn’t know what love was. When I thought I was in “love,” it was actually lust and/or I forced myself to love other person in an unhealthy relationship. I often confused lust with love. I often confused the sexual feelings with love and/or lust. Love get lost in translation somewhere in those areas. To me, having sexual thoughts toward someone meant I was desperate for sex. In turn, I put up a wall against sex out of fear that I would be taken advantage of or seen as a sexual object. Growing up, my appearance were often complimented and/or to be jealous of. Often times, I felt my beauty were a blessing and a curse. Indeed, curse was a strong negative word but I was often attracted to wrong men who only wanted me for sex. During those encounters, I liked and enjoyed the attention but eventually, I questioned their intentions. That increased my trust issues with men. However, I now consider my beauty as a blessing because it protects me. I could see the signs whether men wanted me for who I am or for the way I look. Most often, men used me as their trophy.
Not too long ago, I met a Psychic friend who helped me discover my gift. He taught me and showed me what love was. During the reading, I learned that it was okay to love one who I feel was helping me. I also learned that it was okay to have sexual urges. It does not mean I was a dirty woman who abused sex. Sexual urges were normal feelings as a human. I have those sexual urges only because I wanted that soul connection with someone who I love. Showing your love through sexual intercourse is beautiful. It is a very special connection between two beautiful souls. Sharing and touching bodies is an expression of love.
Before I could share that connection with someone I love, I need to love myself first. There were some times where I felt frustrated and tried to push for things to happen but it doesn’t end up good because I forced it. Forcing someone to love me is most unnatural thing you can do. You need to love yourself first because you will be able to see love in others and you will be able to show love. You need to love yourself first because you will learn that you truly deserve true love and you will attract a right man. You need to love yourself first because you will learn that you are worthy of everything and love. You need to love yourself first because you will learn that it is very important to find a loving, caring, respectful love partner who LOVES you for who you are. Simple as that. The more you love yourself, the more your light will become more brighter. People can see, feel, and want to be close to you. Soon, the next love partner will be attract to your powerful love energy.
True love is easy to find… Look in the mirror and love yourself and love will shine on you forever..- Anonymous